Diaspora life in Germany for many it begins as a temporary solution, but often turns into a state that lasts for decades. The phenomenon that has defined Balkan emigration for decades in countries like Germany, Austria or Switzerland is not just economic – it is deeply psychological. Thousands of families spend decades in apartments that they have never fully furnished to their taste, with furniture that is „temporary“ and plans that always extend only to the next holiday. It is delayed life syndrome, where the present is sacrificed for an uncertain future in the homeland.
In this ApA analysis, we explore why the concept of "temporariness" has become a permanent state of mind and how this mindset affects quality of life, health, and family relationships.
The psychology of the "suitcase under the bed"„
Most of those who have gone „for a few years“ to pay off their loans, build an apartment in their house, or save up for a car are caught in a time trap. Years pass, but the mental suitcase remains packed. Psychologically, this mechanism serves as a defensive shield against complete integration, which many unconsciously perceive as a betrayal of their own identity.
- Emotional detachment: If we admit that we have permanently settled in Munich or Frankfurt, we feel as if we have given up our "birthplace".
- Focus on savings: Temporary life justifies extreme savings. If an apartment in Germany is just a "bedroom", then there is no need for luxury, because "real luxury" is built in BiH.
- Idealization of return: Returning in the mind turns into a magical moment when all problems will disappear, which prevents a person from solving the problems he has here and now.
ApA Note: Living in survival mode while waiting for "real life" leads to chronic stress. Your body doesn't know that your stress is "temporary" – it's feeling the effects of every day you spend being unhappy.
A house in Bosnia and Herzegovina as a monument to the renunciation of diaspora life in Germany
Your previous interest in the topic of empty houses clearly shows that this is a sore point. These huge three-story buildings, where no one lives except for two weeks in August, are physical evidence of a life on hold.
The diaspora often invests any surplus money in concrete and facades in their homeland, while in Germany they avoid buying a quality mattress or a comfortable sofa because it is „wasting money on someone else’s apartment“. The result is a paradox: people live in worse conditions than they could, in order to build castles that their children will probably sell or leave empty. This paradox is typical of diaspora life in Germany, where the present is often sacrificed for a future that never comes.
This phenomenon is not only an economic, but also a demographic problem that changes the image of cities in the homeland. We wrote in more detail about how the diaspora affects the aging of the population and the emptying of urban areas in the analysis of how Sarajevo is becoming a city of old people while young people build their lives in Munich. https://apachannel.com/sarajevo-grad-staraca-dijaspora-minhen/
Why do decades become seconds?
Time runs differently in the diaspora. It is measured from rest to rest. Between two trips "downstairs", life is reduced to a work-home routine. This routine erases the years, and the sense of impermanence only enhances that effect. Suddenly, those "planned five years" become twenty-five, and the children, who were supposed to grow up in Bosnia, are already graduating from university in Germany.
Health in the shadow of the postponed life of the diaspora in Germany
Living for many years in a state of internal conflict - where your body is in Germany and your heart is in BiH - exhausts the organism. Mental fatigue is the first sign that your "temporary" plan is taking its toll.
When we are under constant stress due to nostalgia and guilt, our immune system weakens. In those moments, it is important to turn to nature and support your body. Many members of our diaspora in Germany use natural supplements in these transitional periods to overcome the lack of sun and emotional exhaustion.
If you feel that you need extra energy for everyday challenges abroad, explore proven solutions to strengthen the body at this link. https://thealoeveraco.shop/ZKYQUtGm
Social integration as a turning point in the life of the diaspora in Germany
Temporality is the greatest enemy of integration. If you believe you'll be back in three years, you won't bother to learn the language to C1 level, you won't make deep friendships with the locals, and you won't participate in the social life of the community.
This creates a vicious circle of isolation:
- Insulation: You feel like a stranger because you are not integrated.
- Nostalgia: Because of the isolation, you long for your homeland even more.
- Even greater temporaryity: Longing makes you save even more and plan for your return, further rejecting integration.
APA Guide: How to Stop Waiting and Start Living?
The point is not to give up on returning, but to stop punishing yourself while you are abroad. Life is not a dress rehearsal; every year spent in Germany is real and irretrievable.
- Organize your space: Buy that piece of furniture you want. Even if you only stay for two more years, you deserve to feel at home.
- Invest in experiences, not just concrete: Instead of the fifth room in the house in BiH, take the family on a trip. Memories last longer than the facade.
- Accept dual identity: It is possible to love Bosnia and enjoy the orderliness of Germany. That does not make you a traitor, but a richer person.
Conclusion: The end of an illusion
The truth is painful but liberating: Temporarily is often an excuse for fear of making a decision. The moment you decide that your life is where you wake up every morning, the weight off your back will disappear. Whether you'll be back in a year or ten, start living life to the fullest today.
Diaspora life in Germany it becomes a problem when we stop living in the now, waiting for an ideal moment that may never come.
APA Analysis and Reader's Guide:
| Category | Symptoms of "Temporary" life | Recommended action |
| Housing | Furniture from advertisements, unpainted walls, boxes that are not unpacked. | Invest in comfort. Your home is where your family is tonight. |
| Finance | Extreme savings, focus exclusively on real estate in the homeland. | Diversify your investments. Think about the health and education of children now. |
| Social life | Socializing exclusively with "our people", avoiding local events. | Learn the language. Integration does not mean assimilation. |
| Mental state | Constant nostalgia, feeling guilty about success in a foreign country. | Find balance. Focus on the advantages your current location offers you. |
Do you also feel that your life in Germany is just a „temporary phase“ that has lasted too long? Share your experiences in the comments – have you managed to furnish your German home like a real home or are your suitcases still metaphorically packed?
Read our analysis too: Returning from the Diaspora: The Myth of Success and the Shame of Return. https://apachannel.com/povratak-iz-dijaspore/
